Eduardo, the Protector

Eduardo, my landlady's ex-boyfriend who was using one unit to teach English to adults in before the breakup resulted in her turning it into laundry space, is a shouter. He is also highly protective, and seems especially determined (even without knowing my story yet) to make sure the single lady from the U.S. has a safe experience in the building and community.

This meant that before his classes had to be relocated I could not come or go from my unit without him stopping class to shout loudly, in very careful and formal English like he teaches, 'Hello, Mariah! Where are you going?' And the whole class would turn around and look at me until I answered.

One night just before six as the sun was setting (as it does at 6 p.m. year-round here), I tried to sneak past unnoticed. But like most good teachers, he could sense me even with his back turned through the open door to his classroom and whirled around.

'Where are you going, Mariah?' came the shout.

'To the Pali,' I replied.

'But it is dark out!' he shouted back. 'Are you sure you should walk there?'

'To the Pali,' I shout again, in case he misunderstood me.

The Pali grocery store (which I am told is the least expensive one in the country, and also gratefully has amazing produce) is steps away, literally, with several street lights on the sidewalk in between. He and his entire classroom--plus the dozen or so people out walking to get there themselves--can all see me the entire way there and are all within easy shouting distance.

'You must be careful!' he shouts.

This was the first one of his shouts that caused the women in his classroom to actually make eye contact with me, shaking their heads and rolling their eyes as if to say, 'Eduardo, the Protector! She is just going to the Pali!'

'I'll be careful!' I shout back, not adding that his ex-girlfriend walks back and forth into downtown daily till 9 p.m. and told me she has been doing so safely for 7 years. Or that this part of town is known for virtually no incidents of crime, which I asked and checked around about extensively before moving in.

But that is my new protective friend, Eduardo! And I could probably use a few of those in my life here.
Still, as our airline experiences post 9-11 illustrate, trading privacy for security does have its challenges!

Another day, just before the rains began, he saw me in town walking and pointed to my flip flops. 

'Have you ever lived in Costa Rica before, Mariah?'

I shook my head no.

'Soon it will be raining very hard. You must get yourself a pair of long rubber boots. You cannot walk around in those in the rain. It will not work. It will not be safe for you to walk around without the boots!'

I trotted in to the nearest store and bought myself a pair of boots (same kind I had on loan at the Casita for going in and out of the rain forest exploring.)

Well, the rains are here now. But I am the only one I have ever seen wearing the boots yet! Most people are walking around in sandals or flip flops. 

So the boots mostly stand outside my apartment, with my wishing I had the funds back for internet time or fresh produce instead! 

But the funniest incident caused by Eduardo's protective nature yet came last week. There is a fork in the road leading into downtown, which is great for me both because it gives variety in daily walks and because I can implement the self-defense principles I have living a pedestrian lifestyle in other cities: vary routes and times of day so nothing about your walking routine is predictable.
I had just made the fork to the left and was over on the far side shoulder, when he saw me coming the other direction out of the fork to the right.

'Hello, Mariah!' came the shout. 'Where are you going? You should be over here where there is sidewalk all the way into town. That is safer for you!'

Now, if the road did not have plenty of broad shoulder area on both sides, sidewalk most of the way, plus grass you can walk on... 
or if it weren't the far quieter and less trafficked road of the two, I might have agreed with him. Given how peaceful and easy to navigate it is, however, the other self defense principle of varying my routes between the forks has seemed wiser. But...I wasn't about to try to shout all that back across essentially the width of two roads and bridging the English as second language barrier!
He wasn't giving up, though.

'Where are you going, Mariah?' the shout came again.

By now, people have stopped walking and are staring back and forth between us, awaiting my answer.

'I am going to the Farmers' Market!' I finally shouted back, motioning the direction ahead of me, since that road takes me straight there.

The town practically is a Farmers' Market with year-round fresh produce everywhere, but there is only one event called the Farmers' Market: in a particular building on Friday mornings. And everyone in town seems to know about it.
But he apparently does not hear me.

'Where?' he shouts.

I cupped both hands to my mouth.

'To the Farmers' Market!!'

So now 30 or so strangers out walking and hearing all this (including the ones even stopping to stare and listen) know exactly where I am going!

It was so funny to me after I walked away and thought about what had just happened. I know he means well in trying to keep me safe, but asking me to loudly and publicly advertise my destination every time he sees me does not fit any of the safe walking kinds of classes I've taken or books I've read! Might as well just hang a sign with my destination on it around my neck each time I leave the apartment--in English, Spanish, Chinese and Dutch--so anyone who wants to can find me.

At least stories like these keep the rest of what is unfolding and what I am writing about from getting too dark!


Part II

Shortly after I posted the above, I had to return to my apartment from in town to eat and pick up a few things.  To my surprise, Eduardo and his English class were in the building, but this time up on the upper level of the apartments with no open door access to the outside--just windows.

I figured this would make it much easier to sneak past...but, no.

Once again the shout came, interrupting his English lesson to call out to me from above.

'Hello, Mariah!'

This time, presumably for his class to demonstrate how to use less than formal English like he typically does with me (and especially in front of them), the next line was different.

'What is new?'

Much as this may be a textbook informal English greeting, I can't remember the last time someone actually asked me that and as a result I stood there surprised and unable to think of anything that could be shouted back of what's new in my rather dramatic present life circumstances!

So instead I just kind of stared at him and his classroom full of adults turned and staring down at me and shrugged.

And that's when the depth of his protective side showed through.

He dropped the loud teacher tone of voice, leaned out the window, and asked me a question that caught me totally by surprise,

'Are you happy, Mariah?'

***

I was walking later that day.  The view of the Arenal Volcano and the surrounding mountains was breathtaking.  The air had not only its usual rainforest richness but also the kind of crispness that follows a really hard rain.  I was carrying a bag of fresh basil breathing its incredible aroma, (one of my favorite finds in one of the little produce shops that has since become at least a weekly stop--maybe a 7 x 4 bag stuffed full of basil fresh from an organic garden for 60 cents!)  I had completed another book chapter and was feeling productive and like you can after coming through a tough experience: relieved and grateful and excited about the prospects of how this work can help shift things for the whole.


And I suddenly thought of Eduardo's question again and realized that I am.  Happy, that is.  Very deeply happy despite all the ugliness and danger and difficulty of the past few weeks here in Costa Rica.

It struck me then that of all Eduardo's protective worrying concerns for me, this was the most important.

It is for all those we care about or are looking out for.

• Yes, it matters if my feet and clothing are protected from the torrential rains.

• Yes, it matters if I am able to walk safely on sidewalks away from the risk of vehicles hitting me.

• And yes it definitely matters as a single woman in a strange new country that I am keeping myself safe while walking after dark.

But the real question we all care about is Are you protected internally?  Are you safe inside?  Okay?  Happy?

***

When I arrived at the internet cafe later, I looked up the meaning of the name Eduardo.  

It means Guardian.  

Protector.  

I would say that he is living up to it.